New equipment at my new school

When I accepted the academic position I'm going to be taking in a year (seriously, I'm getting crazy excited and anxious), my new school (NS) agreed to buy a critical piece of equipment so long as I run it as a core facility. 

NS is pulling kind of a dick move: they're asking me to find a lesser costing system. A system that will be able to do the job, though not exactly what I want. I really should have gotten this in writing. On the plus side, they said I can start ordering equipment and outfitting my new lab space. This will allow me to really start as soon as I show up (I hope) and get students faster (I hope) since everything will already be ready (I hope).  

One thing I'm trying to work out given the lesser equipment is that I may be able to get a lab tech with some of the saved money difference. Though a couple year's salary of a lab tech hardly makes up for the equipment difference. I'm going to miss the days of my practically unlimited budget....

Dear Yelpers,

As I have been traveling a ton lately, I am trying to find good places to eat. Some coworkers know of places, some friends have recommendations, and I randomly walk around in cities and find some gems. Sometimes I turn to the internet. Yelp is usually my go-to.

There are a few breeds of Yelpers:

1.  The kind that just reads. 

2.  The kind that posts pics of food. 

3.  The kind that posts pics of the business. 

4.  The kind that posts funny pics.

5.  The kind of posts personal pics. 

6.  The kind that review everything and have to throw in their opinions all the time. 

7.  The kind that genuinely have good tips. 

8.  Combinations of the above. 

Yelp also has review-inflation. This is one of the worst parts of Yelp: most people have horrible tastes in food compared to my preferences. A five star review rarely results in five star flavor.  I sometimes think people are scared to go against the majority so reviews just become more and more positive.

So Yelpers, here's a few comments in regard to each archetype you may fall into:

1.  If you see something missing from a review (incorrect hours, better bartenders than others, etc).  Add it. Otherwise, you're just a user. But be sure to at least rate the place, regardless of whether you post a review. 

2.  There are enough pics of food. Do a quick search and see if the food you want to post hasn't been posted. If it has, then don't post. If it hasn't, absolutely make sure that of the 400+ photos already posted that your's will actually contribute. 

3.  Thank you. I frequently want to know if the restaurant is dingy, has a good view, etc.  These pics are rare, but again, if it's been posted then don't post.
4.  I don't care.  Unless it sheds light on the ambiance.
5.  I really really don't care.
6.  Please make sure it's not the same as every other review.  If it is, just rate.  While you may think we all care about your opinion...we don't.
7.  Please keep posting.  I know your good, unique tips get drowned out by the crap, but I dream of a world where the crap disappears.
8.  See above.

Seriously, a recent city I was in had hundreds of pics and reviews per place and it was impossible to really see what the restaurant had.  Five stars, but worth maybe two.  The bathroom was the dirtiest place, and $$$.

Yelp is supposed to make things easier.  In the time it takes me to see all the freaking pictures of the same foods, and people, and crap reviews I could just go to the restaurant and learn for myself.  In my home city, that's fine, but when I'm traveling in countries where I probably won't visit again, I want to make sure I get the best.  Though I've started to just play restaurant-roulette lately and ignore Yelp. If any readers out there work for Yelp: a feature where you upload and have to list whether its food, ambiance, or other would be awesome.

Sincerely,
Phindustry

So much travel!!!

I hate traveling. And I've been on the road more than at home lately. Normally time on the plane and airports and getting driven around gives me chances to relax, blog, watch movies, etc.  But things have been so damn busy that all I've had time for is work.  With a multiple devices getting ready for FDA-level animal studies and human studies I have to be around to support a lot of MDs. I get to talk advantages while the VP of my company, sales, and other engineers watch. 

Because of this travel I've been missing home a ton. And realizing that I hate the following cities (don't be offended, to each their own...I love certain cities that people despise...and I never get mad at people when they rip on them): Los Angeles, Phoenix, Hope, Houston, and Marseille. And being away from home makes me even more mad about these other cities. And I haven't had time to blog about the frustrations!  My Möbius strip of frustration. 

One interesting thing: yesterday in the airport I sat next to a kid and his mom. They're looking at apartments in the city of a certain Ivy League school. This kid has a lot to his advantage: clearly rich parents that can afford to send him anywhere, years of right control over his life and extracurriculars and school. Part of me is kind of jealous since I got into a lot of these schools but couldn't afford to attend. And I can't help but wonder if a better pedigree would've made job hunting easier. But part of me realizes how the focus of this persons life has been school and school alone. I talked with him a little and there are few people more boring than him.  There must be a good balance of overbearing parent and having an interesting, funny, and balanced kid. Right? ....starting to feel the pressure of wanting to be a parent....

One last thing: I've been flying to tons of places and with tons of different airlines. I love Delta, Alaska, and Virgin airlines. Economy, first, and business classes are all awesome with these two airlines. Considering the prices aren't much different how come other airlines can't bring it like these airlines have?

My no-longer-replacement

I've written about the guy that my company said is to replace me here. At a recent conference he was showcasing some of our new stuff to a few select physicians (the kind of physicians that will keep their mouths shut about our up-and-coming products).  Some of these physicians know and like me, and it's always nice to chat with them. I would introduce my replacement and we would all talk about the medical devices on the horizon. My replacement (Mr. MBA), would chime in every once in a while when he was directed a question during our discussions. He was able to joke around and develop back-and-forth with the physicians, but as soon as anything technical came up (either about the diseases or the devices) he seemed like an idiot.  On top of this, it didn't seem like he cares about patients, which is part of why I despise this guy. The physicians relayed this to me and my superiors that were there. And they were not amused.

So the president of my company has notified me that Mr. MBA will be transferring to marketing since the physicians have notified management that Mr. MBA is not someone they want to work with. Party with, yes, but work with, never. This makes me feel good and bad. Good that he'll be gone (he was horrible for our group) and bad because the physicians don't think I'd be fun to party with. 

So the president, realizing that they made a bad decision, has put me on charge of the hiring committee. I have 2 weeks to make a short-list and 1 week to complete the first round of phone interviews. Then on-sites after that. They want to rush this so they can start training under me.  I've been pushing to get my #2 in charge of my group when I depart in a year but for some reason leadership is obsessed with finding someone external. I suspect it's because my #2 is a quiet kinda gal.  She isn't too aggressive (unlike me), though she's insanely motivated.  I'm planning on training her for the committee.  I suspect her reserved attitude is part of why leadership doesn't want her leading my group.

Patent or perish

Question from a reader:

I want to make the transition from industry to academia, as you are about to.  I haven't published in five years, how can I supplement my CV?  I'm assuming you were in the same boat as I, and most advice I find online is about making the transition to a professorship from a current academic position (post-doc/grad school).

I can't publish my industry work in journals.  The only data of mine that goes public is in FDA filings, so this isn't always the most novel stuff.  I'm somewhere between second-fifteenth author on a couple major publications and conference abstracts where physicians have put me on their work since it's my device they're using, but I didn't really think these counted.  And any data that I got on my own needs to stay within the company.  If competitors take my data and turn it into a successful product then shareholders will be quite upset.  The only way I've been able to publish my work (and keep my CV fresh) was to turn this novel data into medical devices.  This is where patents come in.

With patents, I come up with an idea based on something crazy I think of in the shower (hot, right?) or when I realize that we can turn our data into a device I write a paragraph and attach a couple pics then upload it to our lawyers.  Our lawyers do a prior art search (I can write about the patent process from my point-of-view if you'd like...) then come back to me with how we should write the patent.  Without going into all the details, eventually this results in a plaque with my name and USPTO number on it.

This is how I bridged my academic publications and my industry work.  You've heard of 'publish or perish', in most high-level medical device jobs it's 'patent or perish'.  We get awards, crazy money, and recognition for patents...even if we just submit it and it never turns into a patent...or just a utility patent.  If you're not patenting (thereby preventing the competition from pursuing your awesome idea) then you're falling behind.  Those in the highest levels of scientific leadership here hold tons of patents.

I don't know if this is actually the best thing to do, and some companies choose trade secrets over patents...in which case I don't know what you'd do (advice from other readers, please?).  But this is how I managed to convince academics that I've done something between grad school and my current position.  I'm not sure if this even mattered.  Maybe the pedigree matters more than any patents or pubs...