Wednesday, January 15, 2014

I'm a Watcher



If I had to guess how I got to my position (youngest person in my pay grade and leadership level in the history of my company) I would attribute most of my success to being able to please people. This occurs frequently through scientific or engineering achievement, but a lot of it through pure observation. I feel that I've developed a knack for reading what people want through a joke, plain conversation, a look, or just telling people what they want to hear. I made it a point to acquire this skill along with whatever technical knowledge because I've observed the most successful people having this skill.

These successful people can keep people laughing in the workplace, they can play politics without pissing everyone off, and they can give a presentation on a mundane topic and keep the room engaged. I practiced these skills tremendously. Sometimes more than practicing my art.  This has worked very well for me both in and out of grad school.  Especially after grad school.  I can tell I'm a different person in my industrial lab.  I just wish I could utilize this skill in my interviews for academic jobs.  For some reason I can't...

My problem with this is I sometimes feel fake. Unfortunately, technical ability alone does not equal advancement. In academia, my advisor said he had to kiss the asses of grant reviewers and program leaders. He went to conferences mainly to socialize, not present work. All of this was deemed necessary to get grants. In industry, having a boss like you as a person will get you much farther than having him or her like you as a scientist or engineer.  And these people-pleasing skills are something I picked up from meticulously watching those people perceived as great.  I don't practice this is my personal life, and most of my friends are from outside of work, so I don't feel fake outside of work.  I know that the more I move up and the more money my group gets, the more lives we can save (have I mentioned that we're the best group?).  So 'playing the game' is necessary, even though it's not right.

I was taking to someone about this (another person in scientific leadership in a sister company) and they said that, if you play yourself, you get stuck in a rut. You don't have to be 100% fake, just strategic. If you're in a room full of people from the south, it's probably best not to throw a southern draw and talk about incest the whole time, even if that's something you would do at home with your friends. That isn't much different than putting on a work personality. Don't rock the boat and try to make yourself someone that people would want to publish and fund. In industry, do the same thing, but you do it to get promotions, your ideas taken seriously, and more funds for your lab.  And to be the kind of person people want in scientific leadership, you have to watch.  I don't like this, but I tried to change it when I first showed up, but I knew I wanted to move up and make an impact.  With my team, I find myself acting more like myself, but I'll always watch since it also provides me with ways that I shouldn't act.  Maybe growing up overseas without my parents or a lot of Americans has taught me to mimic those around me to fit in.  I know people aren't going to like this, but there are some things that won't change, and the only way to change things is to play the game and move up.

4 comments:

  1. You always have to play the game, in academia or industry; whether you like it or not !

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  2. I really did try to change the rules, but it's like playing with a 4 year old: they make up the rules, and flip the board if you don't play by them

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  3. When you're a different person, don't you feel like a cheap sell out? I feel like I'm fighting myself sometimes.

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    1. I do feel like a sell-out. But I know that if I want to achieve the greater good I have to play the game to get to a high enough level to influence and change the system.

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